Skank

3 Responses to “50 easy questions to ask any Republican”

1. not a republican Says:
   July 12th, 2006 at 10:50 am

   Answer to question 32:

   (1) Tax cuts
   (2) Tax cuts
   (3) Tax cuts
   …
   (10) Tax cuts
   

2. Jemaleddin Says:
   July 12th, 2006 at 11:30 am

   19. Because my wife will kill me.

3. Anita Says:
   July 17th, 2006 at 10:32 am

   Progressives spend lots of time thinking about nuanced things, so they should have no trouble at all answering these easy questions, which are by definition simple since they are asked by a Republican:
   1. Name ten charities to which you made cash donations last year.
   2. How much time did you spend last year forwarding e-mails asking people to write to congress to demand funding for social services? How much time last year did you spend doing hands-on work with social services organizations that provide direct service to the disadvantaged (eg, Meals on Wheels, homeless shelters, etc.)?
   3. What amount in taxes did you pay to the federal and state government on account of your household help last year?
   4. Would you let Ted Kennedy attend your daughter’s wedding?
   5. What is the last name of the man who mows your lawn?
   6. Would you keep a Guantanamo detainee in your home if that would hasten the closure of the prison at Guantanamo?
   7. One of the tenets of Islam is that non-believers are inferior. In order to
   show proper respect to your detainee’s culture and beliefs, would you and your family convert to Islam?
   8. If you and your family would not convert to Islam, would you and your family (a) provide your detainee with separate dishes and eating utensils from your family’s (b) provide your detainee with his/her own separate bathroom and living areas (c) wear gloves when handling any item that belongs to or is used by your detainee (d) learn Arabic (e) provide all of the items listed in (a) through (d)?
   9. Barbra Streisand makes her movies in Canada, where there are no unions and costs are cheaper. Explain how this helps the American worker in the quest for a “living wage.”
   10. List the reasons why you would or would not invite the Democratic Party to take pictures of your grandmother’s casket for the purpose of producing a fund-raising ad. Would it make any difference in your answer if Howard Dean
   showed up uninvited with a video camera and started filming the service?
   11. Name the total number of months in which you were personally responsible for meeting a payroll, describe the business(es) in which you were personally responsible for meeting the payroll, and state whether the business is still in
   operation.
   12. State the total number of years and months you have drawn a paycheck. Of that number, how many were in the employ of a governmental unit, NGO, or
   organization that was funded by tax money?
   13.Would you allow Ted Kennedy drive the bridesmaids to the church for your daughter’s wedding? Estimate how many bridesmaids would arrive at the church alive if they were so chauffeured.
   14. Your brother-in-law calls you to tell you that as a result of the flood of Birkenstocks manufactured in Indonesia, he has been let go from his job the Florsheim factory. Do you (a) call all your contacts and get him placed in another job which may be somewhat different than what he was used to doing or (b) direct him to a government program where he will receive training in
   efficient assembly of Florsheim shoes?
   15. The 2000 census reports that between 8 and 11 million illegal aliens resided in the United States, versus 2 million illegal aliens counted by the 1980 census. In 1980, 46.5% of the federal and states’ prison population was black; in 2000, 65% of the prison population is black. Describe in detail how the increase in cheap illegal day labor has positively impacted economic opportunity for young men in the African-American community.
   16. You are at a stop light and are rear-ended by a young Hispanic man who has glassy eyes and speaks little English. He also lacks insurance and a valid driver’s license. Should you (a) lock him up (b) impound his car or (c)apologize for taking over “his” continent and let him go because he did not “know” that he needed insurance or a license,due to his inability to read and
   understand English.
   17. A requirement of naturalized citizenship is the ability to understand, read and write the English language. Explain in detail why ballots should be printed in any language other than English, and describe what you would do to
   assure that voters are citizens of the United States.
   18. Bilingual education provides (a) opportunity (b) diversity (c) a perpetual serf class.
   19. Without going to Babelfish or a similar service, translate the following sentence:
   “Me gusta la educacion bilingual porque me gusta que hay criadas baratas.”
   20. Nationwide, the cost of educating the children of illegals is estimated to be $7.6 billion per year. Should progressives sympathic with La Raza and the Aztlanmovement pay a special tax in order to help out with this cost? Why not?
   21. In the 1950’s the average family paid 24.6% of its total income out in local, state, and federal taxes and user fees. In 2006, the total tax burden
   was 31.6% for the average family, meaning that 32 cents of every dollar earned went to pay taxes at the state, local and federal levels. Over that same period of time, inflation rate was 743.83%, meaning that a 1950 dollar is now worth 13 cents. In order to keep up with inflation and the tax burden, more households are two-income households. The top 25% of households yearly income is $50,000 or higher. Explain in detail how a couple consisting of a securityguard married to a doctor’s receptionist, each making $25,000 per year is “rich.”
   32. The children of all the Kennedys, John Kerry, Al Gore, Bill and Hillary Clinton all attended private schools. Explain in detail why the children of Taniqua Jackson and Jose Villalobos should not, and how remaining in public
   schools will provide the Jackson and Villalobos children the same opportunities enjoyed by the Kennedy, Kerry, Gore and Clinton offspring.
   33. It was discovered after 9/11 that several Islamist “charities” made millions in puts on American corporations. Explain in detail how the New York Times publication of the details of the SWIFT program for tracking the movement of
   terrorist money abroad will prevent a similar windfall to al Quaeda.
   34. Name six Christian leaders of the past decade who have taken (or ordered the taking of) non-Christians hostage, beheaded non-Christians, or have preached that it is the duty of Chrtistians to kill all non-Christians or force their conversion on pain of death.
   35. In 1994, then-president Bill Clinton (acting through former president Jimmy Carter) negotiated a trade pact/treaty with North Korea whereby food, oil, technology and a nuclear reactor would be provided to North Korea in exchange for North Korea’s promise to use the technology solely for civilian purposes. Explain in detail the “civilian purposes” of North Korea’s nuclear weapons
   program and the long range missiles tested by North Korea in early July of 2006.
   36. The first car bomb exploded in the World Trade Center in 1993. In 1996, terrorists attacked the military complex and Khobar Towers in Saudi Arabia, wounding hundreds of Americans and killing 19. In 1998, the American embassies in Dar-es-Salaam and Nairobi were bombed, killing 258 people. In 2000, 17 sailors were killed in the terrorist attack on the USS Cole. All of these
   attacks were linked to al Quaeda. Osama bin Laden was offered to the Clinton administration for capture by Sudan in 1996, an unidentified Arab country in 2000. Neither Sandy Berger nor Clinton ever responded to the offers. 2,000 New Yorkers are dead today because bin Laden remained at large. Explain why Clinton did nothing to take Osama bin Laden into custody.
   37. Your daughter’s wedding reception has commenced. Will you allow Ted Kennedy to tend the bar? Explain in detail why you would or would not.
   38. In the mid-1960’s, Daniel Patrick Moynihan warned that the programs in War on Poverty would likely result in the destruction of the black family. All of the War on Poverty programs are in existence today, and the rate of illegimate
   births in the black community has gone from 23% to 69%. The rate of kids living in poverty in 1965 was 21%. The rate of kids living in poverty in 2006 is 21%. Aside from providing government jobs, and causing progressives to donate less to
   charity, what has the Great Society/War on Poverty accomplished?
   39. Your mother is in a coma after suffering a stroke. Since her quality of life is obviously not what it was, do you (a) slip some cyanide into her IV tube or (b) simply tie her to the bed, remove the IV, and have her slowly die of thirst and malnutrition?
   40. Former Vice President Al Gore has made a movie which claims that climate change is caused by gas and the burning of fossil fuels. Should he cease
   traveling in his private jet and his SUV, or should Michael Moore eat fewer nachos?
   41. When was the last time you read the Koran, particularly books 9 and 15? Explain why the Koran is superior to the Bible, and why the public schools’ teaching children to be Muslims does not violate the First Amendment, but having a memorial cross for war dead on Mount Soledad does.
   42. We all know that we all should do our share to help lessen the US’s dependence on foreign oil, particularly for electrical generation. Explain why Teddy Kennedy (and a whole lot of other rich progressives)should not have to do their fair share by having the view off Martha’s Vineyard altered by electricity-generating windmills.
   43. Progressives have blocked drilling for oil off the US coastline in the Atlantic. The People’s Republic of China has just signed a pact with Cuba, and will be drilling for oil in the Atlantic. Explain how the Chinese will be
   environmentally responsible in the drilling and transport of the oil, and why it is more desirable that the Chinese have the oil than it is for the US to have it.
   44. It has cost upwards of $24 million and three years of investigation of who leaked Valerie Plame’s name to Robert Novak, who found her name in Joseph Wilson’s biography in Who’s Who. Explain why the leaking of Ms. Plame’s name to the press is more heinous than the leaking of the details of the SWIFT program for tracking terrorist funds in foreign accounts to the New York Times.
   45. If you were in a serious acccident and could not speak or move without assistance, would you want Michael Schiavo to be your nurse? Would your answer differe if it were your child who had been in the accident? Your spouse?
   46. During the last great immigration, immigrants debarked at Ellis Island and were quarantined for communicable diseases and general physical fitness. Those who were diseased were sent back to their country of origin. Few of the
   immigrants could initially speak English. The immigrants who made it past Ellis Island learned English, and most were European. Explain why it is not racist to allow people who have deadly diseases and who refuse to learn English
   to walk across the border and take up permanent residence in the United States.
   47. Explain why Andrea Yates’ drowning of her five children was not a late-term abortion. Would your answer be different if she had simply driven sharp
   scissors into the bases of their skulls?
   48. The wedding guests are now departing. Another Kennedy is in attendance as well, and wishes to escort some of the more fetching ones to their cars. Do you tell Mr. Skakel (a) “not on your life” or (b) “after we lock up the golf
   clubs” or (c) “why don’t you catch a ride home with Teddy?”
   49. Explain why progressives spend so much time on sexuality and sexual issues, but don’t appear to get any.
   50. Explain whom you would prefer accompany you in a dark alley in a rough part of town and why: (a) Dick Cheney (b) Harry Reid (c) Howard Dean (d) John Kerry